Welcome to the first edition of The Moat. I'm really excited for all the amazing discussions we're going to have.
As founders, we’re always told to build our moat. Something that makes the business defensible. But for me, the idea of a moat doesn’t limit itself to strategy or competition.
Through my newsletter, I want to share all the things that help build moat. But in this first edition, I’m sharing something personal.
Because before I could think about building a moat for my business, I had to learn how to build one for myself.
So, let’s start there.
So, here’s what I’m going to preach today. Just kidding. Relax, I’m just here to talk.
But about something that’s really close to my heart.
Asking for what you want and what you deserve.
I once heard Jim Carrey talk about asking the universe for what you really want. Not just hoping. Not just waiting. Actually asking.
And I found myself yelling YES. Out loud. At my phone. My cat wasn’t impressed.
Anyway...
If there’s one thing that’s helped in my career advancement more than anything else, it’s this:
You get what you deserve by asking for what you want.
Now, I know what you might be thinking: “Cool, but what if I’ve already asked... and got nothing?”
Fair. Been there too.
Because asking doesn’t guarantee you’ll get what you want.
But not asking? That guarantees you won’t.
And sometimes, that’s the difference between staying stuck or moving forward.
Let’s talk about it.
We’ve all been sold the same equation:
Work hard → Get noticed → Get rewarded.
But that’s not how the world works. There will be times when you’re putting in the hours, delivering results, being the “reliable” one… and yet somehow, someone else leaps ahead.
Why? Because they asked.
Now, I’m not saying just asking will always work.
It works when you’ve already shown up, done the work, and ensured effective value communication of your role. That’s what gives your asking power.
In other words, when people see you deliver real results, they’re more likely to listen when you ask for more.
So, let’s stop assuming hard work is obvious. It’s not.
Let’s stop hoping someone will magically notice. They won’t.
Speak up. Back it up. And give yourself a chance.
A few years ago, I was working hard, hitting every target, staying late, doing the right things.
But I didn’t want to wait three years to be “seen.” I wanted leadership acceleration. So, I walked up to my manager and asked,
“What’s the usual timeline for moving into a leadership role?”
He said, “Three to four years.”
I said, “Cool. How can I do it in six months?”
He blinked. Laughed. Then said,
“Hit these goals. Let’s see.”
Challenge accepted.
I mapped it out, crushed the targets, and… I got the role.
Not because I was the loudest.
Not because I was the most experienced.
But because I made it clear what I wanted, and backed it up.
Yes, timing matters. So does context. But clarity? That’s what moves the needle.
And sometimes, all it takes is asking the right person the right question.
Let’s talk about the thing no one likes to admit:
Telling people you’re good at something feels… weird.
Especially if you’ve been taught to keep your head down and let your work “speak for itself.”
Except... your work doesn’t talk. You do.
Now, having a self-promotion mindset doesn’t mean turning every win into a LinkedIn announcement.
It just means being able to say, clearly and confidently, “Here’s what I did, and here’s why it mattered.”
Yes, it feels uncomfortable. Especially for women.
We’ve been conditioned to say:
“It was a team effort.”
“I was lucky to be part of it.”
“I think I did okay?”
But the reality is if people don’t know what you bring to the table, they’ll overlook you no matter how great you are.
And no, this isn’t about being arrogant. It’s about being honest.
If Beyoncé had waited for someone to discover her talent, she’d still be performing in someone’s backyard.
You don’t need to shout. But you do need to own your work.
Because if you won’t… who will?
If you’ve made it this far, you already know the truth:
When you’re clear about what you want, when you’ve done the work to back it up, and when you ask the right person at the right time — you give yourself a real shot.
And if the answer is no? That’s still better than never asking and always wondering.
Because the worst thing you can do is talk yourself out of an opportunity before someone else even gets the chance to say yes.
So here’s your sign.
Stop waiting. Start asking. Say it clearly.
Show your work. Keep showing up.
You get what you ask for and work hard to earn. And you deserve every bit of it.
